For the past few days, I've been helping Kim with party projects for her cousin's birthday. I'm enjoying myself quite a bit because it's fun to learn how to make pirate flags, banners and all this crazy things that I want to do when I have kids of my own. Of course, because we do spend a lot of time together, I get talk to Kim and Kenny a lot. They give the best advice about everything and the tell the coolest, funniest and most entertaining stories. I have such high regards and respect for all that they went through in their life, whether it be their love story or job/education endeavors, just anything and everything. To add on, I love how they're both so quirky. They're honestly the coolest couple ever. They're so funny and I'm so happy, as well as absolutely grateful to have them in my life. I love them both so much and they really are the older brother and sister I never had.

Life has honestly been tough for the past month. There's things going on within my family that I don't really know how to process or completely understand yet. From this point on, nothing will ever be the same and the thought of that scares me. How did we get to be like this? Is the hatred and misery just too much to overcome? There's such a great sadness I feel towards this subject and I wish there was more unity, as well as love between all of us. Regardless, I love my family very much. We learn from being hurt, from seeing pain and one day, we can get past this and progress towards a better understanding of what really matters in life. Everything happens for a reason and I already know that the reason that this is happening is to appreciate each other no matter the faults. Time will only serve to better ourselves.

In other news, my sister got into UCLA! She's still waiting on other schools, but I'm 99% sure she's going there. I cant express how excited, happy and proud I am of her!! :)

It's my last year of college and I'm beyond excited for the conclusion of my time at UCSD. As I look forward to the future, I can't help but reflect back on the journey that I took to get here. The choices I made, the friendships and loves I've lost and gained and just everything. I'm not exactly where I want to be yet, but I can't help but feel lucky for everything that I have. I'm really thankful and grateful. I hope that this year marks the beginning of my transformation from a girl to a full pledge independent woman.

I haven't felt overwhelmed in awhile, but every stress and thought that I've been suppressing or dealing with little by little came at me with full force today. I felt so weighed down by the gravity of my stress, I was practically walking with my face on the floor. Life can't always be rainbows and pots of gold and I just have to come to terms with the variety of it all. Remaining positive regardless of opposition is my best bet at staying happy and that's exactly what I'm going for. It's such an amazing feeling to have faith and to have a relationship with God, as well as an amazing relationship with my cousins Mae and Anne, because having that gets me through the bad days, as well as keep me grateful for the good.

In my lit class, one of my group members was saying that going to college made him lose his path to God. Being exposed to higher education and more secular ordeals strayed his path, but for me, it's the opposite. The more I learn about how cells work and just getting into my major, as well as life's little curve balls has strengthened my faith in God. I feel so blessed every day to be alive, to have my friends and family by my side, and the opportunities that I have. I may not look the way I wish I could or be as smart as others or have as much money, but those things are irrelevant at the end of the day because I am happy with what I have. Having enough sleep helps too, haha. I just need to keep pushing forward, take the suffering for the next few months because I am near the finish line with UCSD and I am slowly molding myself into the kind of woman that I want to be.

hi ej. i love you <3

This is my favorite video of all time. It just brings me so much happiness.

http://vimeo.com/32422441